I’ve been sitting around for a couple of months trying to think of what else I need to do to feel free. The moods were changing way too often. I would be happy and ok one minute, then lying in bed just down so low, the carpet covered my head. Then a few days later it would be like nothing happened. I wasn’t quite sure where my mental health was trying to go.
I’ve carried a lot of emotional baggage in my mind. We’re talking all the way back to when I started Kindergarten. Firstly, that’s a hell of a memory, secondly, that shit gets heavy after awhile. Every time I thought I was ok, something would trigger me and I would spiral again.
I thought moving to Dubuque, all of that would change, but it didn’t. I needed to figure out how to shake all the garbage I’ve carried throughout life. Wasn’t sure how to do it, or should I say I wasn’t quite ready to do the steps I knew I needed to do to free myself. Unfortunately, sometimes you can get used to being in a spiral and that becomes the only feelings you have. You start to think it’s ok because at least you’re feeling something. Ahh, but everyone has a breaking point, at least I finally reached mine.
My biggest issue is I am still friends with most of the people from my past relationships. Now, they’re each idiots in their own way, but hey (fist bump on the chest) I’m still their for them. I do seriously question my stability when I see what I’ve allowed into my life, but that’s not what this is about. My other issue is I carry a lot of anger for my parents, ok a lot more than anger, but again, this isn’t about that.
Those that know me well, know I am Pagan. It’s kind of funny because when I had my surgery three years ago, the priest came in my room and asked what religion I wanted to put on my paperwork. I told him I’m Pagan and he took a step back, collected himself and said, we should just leave it blank. He then left me some pamphlet on Catholic teachings. I had a good chuckle as I put the pamphlet under some papers that weren’t seen. But this isn’t about that either.
I’ve gotten more into my path and my intuitions. I’ve been pouring myself into it and it’s been very freeing. I started looking into cordcutting, the ritual of cutting emotional ties with people that no longer serve your purpose. Now, I researched this for a month,ways to properly do it so that it works. Then I found an article on why you shouldn’t cut the etheric cord between you and another. Well, that article made me think twice for a couple of weeks. It says cutting the cords could hurt the other person or you leave yourself open to continuously attract the same type of people, maybe worse. I’m tired of choosing people that are mental drains and psychic vampires, so I panicked. Only for a little bit.
Cutting the etheric cord doesn’t mean you won’t be friends with someone. Although that can very well happen. It’s cutting the emotional cord between you and another person that has formed because of some type of relationship. It’s releasing hurtful bonds and freeing yourself from mental drainage these hurtful bonds can create.
So, I decided to do the ritual. I made a list of 15 people I wanted no emotional attachments to, nothing at all. That list included family, friends and of course all of my past relationships. It says once you do this ritual, you’ll feel it. You might feel tired, emotional or headaches. Well, I had an instant headache and I walked into the wall. So I added a little shoulder pain to go with the headache.
The relief for me was instant and I’ve never felt so free. I can talk with these people and not feel anything emotional towards them and wish them well. Do they know what I did? I’m sure they have a sense I did something because my conversation is lighter and they have no affect on me. Do the family members know? Well four are dead and the others, I could care less. A huge part of me wants to publish this list, but that serves no purpose.
Sometimes in life, we have to make decisions for better health, our mental health depends on it. It’s possible to talk with people and not allow the emotional carnage they cause to affect you. Cutting the etheric cords doesn’t have to end badly, you just have to decide when the cords are suffocating you and make steps to take care of yourself first. 🌞🌞
Dreadz With An Attitude 
Great idea! I may end up trying that myself! Enjoyed this post
Thank you so much!